When an oxygen tank exploded aboard Apollo 13 on April 13, 1970, the mission to land on the moon ended in an instant. Three astronauts were suddenly fighting for their lives nearly 200,000 miles from Earth, while engineers and flight controllers inside NASA’s Mission Control in Houston, TX raced to solve problems that had never been seen before.

Leading one of those teams was flight director Gene Kranz. Contrary to the way Hollywood often tells the story, Kranz did not lead by having all the answers. He helped create an environment where experts with different viewpoints could challenge assumptions, debate solutions and test ideas without losing sight of a common mission: bringing the crew home safely. Every voice in Mission Control mattered, but no one was there simply to win an argument. They were there to solve a problem together.

Most days, leaders are not navigating a life-or-death crisis, but many are leading through a different kind of turbulence. Political divisions, social issues and an endless stream of online commentary have made communication more difficult. A routine team meeting can quickly veer into sensitive territory. A social media post can spark unexpected backlash. Even casual conversations among colleagues can expose deep differences in beliefs and values.

The instinct is often to avoid these conversations altogether. But silence rarely builds trust, and confrontation rarely changes minds. The better path is one Kranz demonstrated more than 50 years ago: Keep the mission bigger than the disagreement.

Organizations are strongest when people can challenge ideas without attacking one another, offer different perspectives without questioning motives and remain committed to working together when they disagree. In today’s polarized environment, that may be one of the most important communication skills a leader can help develop for their team.

I recently interviewed political strategist and social impact leader Kristal Knight for my “Pitch Live” podcast (episode 65) to discuss how people can keep conversations productive without sacrificing relationships. One point Knight returned to throughout our conversation was that, “two things can be true at the same time.”

We can respect one another and disagree. We can hold firm convictions while remaining curious. We can protect relationships without compromising our values.

Knight has spent her communications career in politics, an area I have often tried to avoid because of its intensely polarized environment. Interviewing her gave me a fresh perspective on how strategies used in the political world can help us communicate more effectively in everyday professional settings.

For leaders in any industry, the goal should not be to eliminate disagreement. It should be to prevent disagreement from becoming division.

Mission Before Ego and Opinion

One of Kranz’s greatest strengths as flight director was his ability to keep every conversation centered on the mission. Engineers debated, flight controllers challenged assumptions, and experts offered competing solutions. But the objective remained clear: Bring three astronauts home safely.

We can bring that same discipline into the workplace.

Too often, difficult conversations become competitions rather than collaborations. We stop listening because we are preparing our next point. We interrupt because we are determined to be understood before we understand someone else. Eventually, the original issue gets buried beneath the need to prove who is right.

“Do not engage in a conversation simply to be right,” Knight shared with me during our interview. “Engage to learn and understand a different perspective.”

When the goal becomes learning instead of winning, conversations become less about defending positions and more about discovering information. People lower their defenses because they feel heard rather than challenged. Leaders earn credibility because they demonstrate confidence without pretending to possess absolute certainty.

Keeping the mission at the center also provides a path back when a conversation begins to drift into personal territory. Whether a team is launching a product, serving customers or solving a crisis, its shared purpose should remain larger than any individual opinion.

This is where Knight’s reminder that two things can be true at once becomes especially useful. You can respect someone while disagreeing with that person’s position. You can support a colleague without sharing every opinion that colleague holds. You can challenge an idea without attacking the person presenting it.

Instead of asking who is right, ask what outcome you are trying to achieve together. Shared purpose creates common ground and reminds people that they are working toward something larger than their differences. For leaders, the goal should not be to have the last word. It should be to ask the next right question.

Curiosity Before Certainty

Mission Control was built on questions. Assumptions were tested, recommendations were challenged, and possible solutions were explored before decisions were made. Curiosity was not a sign of weakness. It was part of the process.

When conversations become polarized, certainty often becomes the loudest voice in the room. Social media has conditioned us to deliver opinions quickly, defend them passionately and move on before considering another perspective.

Knight encourages people to approach difficult conversations with genuine curiosity and a willingness to be changed by what they hear.

“Be willing to be moved on an issue,” she said. “Be open to another perspective.”

That does not mean abandoning your values or compromising your principles. It means recognizing that people arrive at their opinions through experiences you may not fully understand.

Instead of concentrating on how to convince someone to accept your views, ask what experiences brought that person to a different conclusion. That perspective can transform a debate into a dialogue. It also sends an important message to your team: Every voice deserves to be heard, even when opinions differ. A leader who enters every conversation certain that there is nothing left to learn is not creating dialogue. That leader is delivering a verdict.

Relationship Before Being Right

One of the most remarkable aspects of the Apollo 13 rescue was not simply the technical brilliance inside Mission Control. It was the trust that already existed among the people doing the work. Kranz’s team could withstand difficult exchanges because each member respected one another’s expertise and remained focused on the work rather than taking challenges personally. Perhaps the most valuable questions Knight shared during our conversation was also one of the simplest: “What is this relationship beyond the disagreement?”

It is a question every leader should ask before entering a difficult conversation. Long after a meeting ends or a debate fades, the relationship remains. The person on the other side may be a colleague, manager, client, collaborator or family member. People should not become disposable simply because they see an issue differently.

Protecting a relationship does not require avoiding difficult topics. Knight said it requires emotional discipline and an acceptance that the other person may never arrive at your point of view. You may never arrive at theirs, either.

The key is to recognize when heated emotions begin taking over the conversation so you can deliberately take steps to lower the temperature. Knight says she learned from her years of debating politics on national television, that this may mean pausing before responding or smiling when you feel yourself becoming defensive. It may also help to prepare pivot phrases such as, “Can you consider another perspective,” or, “Some people may see this differently.”

These small acts of restraint can prevent a disagreement from becoming a personal conflict. Not every difficult conversation will end in consensus, and that is okay.

Facts Matter, but Timing Matters More

One lesson from Apollo 13 that is often overlooked is that Mission Control did not solve every problem the moment it appeared. The team worked methodically, addressing the most urgent challenges first and setting aside others until the timing was right. Success depended not only on making the right decisions, but also on making them in the right order.

Communication requires similar judgment. Just because something should be said does not always mean it should be said immediately. Knight emphasizes the importance of situational awareness. Before entering a difficult conversation, she encourages people to ask themselves, “Is this the appropriate time to have this conversation?”

Timing can influence whether people become defensive or receptive. A colleague rushing between meetings may not have the emotional capacity for a meaningful discussion. A high-profile client dinner may cause people to defend their positions rather than examine them honestly. Even a well-intentioned conversation can fail when the environment encourages conflict instead of reflection.

Situational awareness also requires reading the room. Are people emotionally charged? Are they distracted by another challenge? Sometimes leadership means speaking up. At other times, it means waiting for a setting in which the conversation can be productive.

Choosing the right moment is not the same as avoiding the issue. It increases the likelihood that the conversation will accomplish what you intended.

When Leadership Requires a Voice

I first met Knight in 2021 when we invited her to serve as a panelist for INICIVOX’s “Elephant in the Room” racism series, an award-winning virtual discussion that brought together communication experts from across industries for honest conversations about racism in the workplace.

Those discussions were not always comfortable, nor were they intended to be. They challenged participants to listen before responding, confront difficult realities and make space for perspectives that had too often been overlooked.

At the end of my interview with Knight, I asked her to reflect on how far we have come since those conversations, and where we stand today. Her response was both encouraging and sobering. She said she believes more leaders are willing to step into difficult discussions than they were several years ago. There is greater recognition that silence rarely solves problems and that meaningful progress begins with dialogue. But the work is far from finished.

One point she stressed was especially important: Being respectful does not mean being silent. Too often, we avoid uncomfortable conversations to preserve harmony. In reality, that silence may allow distrust, bias or harmful behavior to go unchallenged.

There are moments when your voice is needed most. If you witness racism, sexism, discrimination or behavior that undermines another person’s dignity, speaking up requires more than careful wording. It requires action.

The goal is to create workplaces where people feel respected enough to contribute, challenged enough to grow and valued enough to belong.

Apollo 13 demonstrated that extraordinary outcomes depend on people who can work together under extraordinary pressure. Knight reminds us that the same principles apply today. Strong leaders stay curious, protect relationships, choose their timing wisely, and keep the mission bigger than their egos.

But when the moment demands it, they also speak up. NIE

Amy Summers, founder and president of Pitch Publicity, has three decades of experience working with major clients in the natural products industry to increase national publicity exposure across all mass media outlets, while also developing key strategic communication strategies. As a pioneer in remote work and virtual mentorship, Summers launched INICIVOX to help individuals improve a wide range of soft skills centered on the complexity of communications. This work has earned her business, education and communication awards in entrepreneurship, corporate social responsibility, and diversity, equity and inclusion from PR News and Nutrition Business Journal. Headquartered in New York, NY, Summers is committed to supporting, nurturing and lifting the growth of the natural products industry that has served her well throughout her career. Her bestselling book, Lift: 10 Mentorship Touchpoints to Empower Your Team and Accelerate Your Career (Page Two, February 2026), offers a modern approach to leadership grounded in presence, purpose, confidence, and connection. Start lifting at LiftToLead.com.